I know it's hard to tell white men with brown hair apart, so here's an easy guide: Jarrad, Thomas, Tom, Corey and Jack, of course with host Natalie Gruzlewski.
The Farmer Wants A Wife reunion has happened. It’s been and gone.
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One couple has broken up, another is staying strong, and a farmer had continued contact with a different contestant after the show.
The reunion was at least half flashbacks, which is a really great way to pad out a reunion with five boring men and five lovely women.
Let’s just get into the juice, one last time.
The episode began with host Natalie Gruzlewski interrogating Gumbie look-alike farmer Thomas about past contestant Claire.
Reminder for anyone who forgot, Claire and Thomas were my frontrunners until Claire up and left after feeling their connection dwindle.
Thomas was very sad, but then necked on with Clarette and felt much better.
But then, disaster struck the couple. Thomas was still texting with Claire and even met up with her.
The reunion basically went over the drama again, but then new details were revealed.
Thomas had continued to text Claire even after the show finished.
But don’t worry, like a plant, Clarette is doing wifey things for Thomas, such as feeding and watering him.
They’ve made it despite the trials and tribulations of their relationship and it’s confirmed she is moving to him, with a teaching job lined up.
If I had to look at it, so do you.
I simply cannot imagine talking about them any more.
Let’s talk about my favourite girl and least favourite boy. Keeley and Corey.
Their main problem, if you’d call it that, was that Keeley didn’t want to abandon her career for a man in the middle of woop-woop and Corey didn’t want to do long-distance.
But then he picked her and she stood strong.
But host Nat was really trying to get Keeley to say she’d move, but good on her, Keeley, once again, stood strong.
Corey was also there and got to watch a compilation of his serial kissing.
Jack, who could be mistaken for a Year 10 boy, and beautiful and giggly Sarah, are still together.
And in a sentence that I’m sure my grandmother would have things to say about, Sarah will be moving to Tassie, but “sending her animals first”.
Then came Jarrad and Chloe.
Actual footage of me seeing Jarrad take out his guitar.
He couldn’t balance a music career, the farm and the gorgeous Chloe, and she wasn’t getting the time she needed.
So, in a shocking show of maturity, they decided they just weren’t a right fit.
But they both came to the reunion, sat next to each other, and posed together for photos.
I wish the best for them both.
My fav girly Georgie, aka Trevor’s mum, and Tom aka Trevor’s new dad.
Now, my favourites, my girl and my guy, Georgie and Tom.
Their relationship is great, they’re both still cuties, and there’s literally nothing negative to say about them.
I was wondering if we would go the whole reunion without Jarrad serenading the cast while they awkwardly dance.
Don’t worry, that’s precisely how we ended the episode.
Farmers and their wives, or ex-wives (sorry Jarrad), and host Natalie Gruzlewski.
Now for the season ranking.
Georgie and Tom
Chloe and Jarrad
Sarah and Jack
Keeley and Corey
Clarette and Thomas
I will not be accepting feedback on my list, please and thank you.
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