But even he knows that's hard to believe.
Ibrahim Helmy is not the first Transport for NSW official to be accused of manipulating procurement and contract processes for corrupt benefit.
The state's Independent Commission Against Corruption inquiry is the fourth since 2019.
The 38-year-old was in hiding when hearings began in July, with a warrant out for his arrest since May.
Police found him in a cupboard in September.
The inquiry heard on Friday he sent confidential documents to one contractor he later received payments from, helping them finalise a bid for traffic control work.
He converted other contractors' plans from PDF to editable Microsoft Word documents, and sent them on to Direct Traffic the day before their tender was due.
It only took 30 seconds, Mr Helmy said.
"It's not about the time it took you ... it's about the fact of you doing it," counsel assisting the inquiry Rob Ranken SC said.
"Sure," Mr Helmy responded.
"I didn't realise it was commercial in confidence," he said of the documents, marked "commercial in confidence" and "for internal use only".
"I was sending him a sample so he can do his own."
He acknowledged it was not appropriate to provide so much assistance, but denied he did so expecting to benefit in the future.
But Mr Helmy later said it was "obvious" he would benefit, and "might have provided a bit extra help" to ensure the contractor could get work.
It came amid repeated questioning from Mr Ranken and Commissioner John Hatzistergos, as both appeared to become frustrated.
"We seem to be going around in circles," Mr Ranken said at one point.
Mr Helmy denied telling Direct Traffic to list more depot locations to qualify for work in more regions, and assuring them they would not be checked.
The inquiry previously heard the company listed depots at motels and caravan parks.
"I may have ignored checking these on purpose, but I definitely did not direct him to put multiple addresses," Mr Helmy said.
More than $343 million in work was awarded to multiple contractors during the alleged scheme, with Mr Helmy accused of receiving more than $11.5 million.
But he was not always happy with how he received it.
Gift cards loaded with $1000 and arriving every couple of weeks were going to expire before he had the chance to spend them.
Deposits into his bank account were also no good.
"Because it leaves a trail," Mr Helmy told the inquiry.
Eventually he started receiving cash payments, which he tracked in a spreadsheet.
He later showed the spreadsheet to Direct Traffic, claiming they owed him more than $785,000 by June 2021.
Mr Ranken suggested on Friday afternoon Mr Helmy, and other transport officials he brought into the alleged scheme, found it funny and weren't concerned about being detected.
Mr Helmy refuted suggestions of being "inherently arrogant" about the scheme, but acknowledged he eventually gained full control over procurement panels with no supervision.
"I know it's hard to believe, but not every single thing I did was improper," he said.
"But there was a lot that you did that was improper wasn't there," Mr Ranken asked.
"There was," Mr Helmy said.
"But not everything."
Mr Helmy has not been criminally charged but has been in custody to appear before the commission.
He will continue giving evidence on Wednesday.
