Farmer Harry from Kyabram and student pilot Gabrielle, who we've voted this episode's funniest person. With confidence she walked up, shook hands and said “Farmer Chris was it?” which got a smile from Harry. When the big ‘what are you looking for’ question was popped, Gabrielle said ”that’s a really good question. I’m looking for something casual. Non-committal.“ The sarcasm of this reply, compared to other girls who were talking about kids and marriage within two to three years, was genius.
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Channel Seven
It is here. The most well-dressed occasion to ever hit agriculture — Farmer Wants A Wife, episode one.
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If you thought bidding at a ram auction or bull sale was high pressure, spare a thought for our five farmers who’ll be making some very important genetic and bloodline decisions under the intense glare of multiple cameras.
One has already cracked. Tears welled up when he was forced to cull off four of his potential girls on day one. I commend the dairy farmer’s sensitivity. Getting up at 2.30am every morning wears a man thin sometimes. No judgement.
Another top moment was when one girl weaponised what she confidently called her ‘best pickup line’.
“Just to show you I’m super romantic,” she began with a flick of the hair. “Did you fart? Because you’ve blown me away?”
This got a blank look from Farmer Will. Once the joke was explained a second time Will said: “No, you’d know if I farted. Trust me.”
Well they’ve certainly blown us away. Unfortunately, this lass did not survive the episode one knock-outs.
Dairy farmer Ben with a few of his ladies. Most important is the girl in the mint green shirt. Lauren grew up on an Undera dairy farm and still works in the Goulburn Valley as a vet nurse. Talk about a catch!
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Channel Seven
While our local lads were busy meeting the ladies, their towns were meeting them too. When a barista walked out for Kyabram’s Harry, we could feel the many cafe owners sitting up straighter (would she like a job at Wickedly Deevine? Hours are negotiable).
And when a hairdresser pressed the flesh with Berriwillock’s Will, everyone within a 50-kilometre radius of his farm (all 20 of them) started dreaming about how different their lives could be with a neighbourhood salon.
The Sunday night premiere barely included our first ever female farmer and her lucky lads, but I predict episode two will be dedicated to her shifting through the city boys and culling her bottom four.
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